Jay sits next to Lenore's cubical and is always annoyed with her. Today we had lunch and he wanted to tell me about a run-in he'd had with her after Arturo came for a visit. Below is my version of his retelling.
(Today Arturo, Lenore's friend, stops by for a visit and per usual assaults the office with his abundance of cologne. Jay, who is in nose and earshot of this is irked and having a difficult time breathing. When Arturo leaves Jay decides to mention something to Lenore about her friend's spray-on indulgence.)
Jay: (peaking his head over his cubicle) Lenore, was that your friend?
Lenore: (craning neck) Oh, yes, yes.
J: Could he wear more cologne?
L: What do you mean?
J: Can't you smell him!? His cologne really bothers my eyes! I was going to say something earlier but I didn't want to be rude.
L: Well, uh, I don't smell anything. He's my friend. I don't say that you smell bad.
J: I don't wear cologne.
L: Maybe you should!
J: Your friend doesn't personally stink, but his cologne is very potent. It's just hard to breath.
L: (offended) Fine! I'll pass the message to him! Next time he comes in I'll say, (mimicking Jay) "Hello, you stink!"
J: You can just say, "Hello, don't marinate in your cheap cologne before coming into the office."
Originally posted April 22, 2008